2002-12-18
11:03 a.m.
or I can clean
hey look, I never learn. I can make the exact same rash mistake six times (so far), and not find anything wrong with my approach (I still don't). I can stay up all night scribbling hope onto sketch pads with watercolour crayons, seething and sore well into the morning, and still feed the benefit of the doubt to this monstrous dowsing rod in my bones all day. it's the gift my parents gave me with both of my names: loyalty, devotion, the benefit of the goddam doubt at all costs. I wouldn't change it for the world, though. I don't do anything half-assed if I care about it, and I care about this so much, even if it looks as though I shouldn't. like I've never been scared before
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